Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Dear Sir or Madam:

I am applying for the park leader position. I would love to have the opportunity to work with kids, especially the younger ones, because they take directions better and are easier to intimidate. As you can see from my resume, I have had a variety of experiences working with kids, and I have learned valuable skills from those experiences, such as which poop jokes make the kids laugh hardest, and where to poke so it really hurts. I can confidently say that I’m friendly, outgoing, fun, and encouraging.

In terms of CPR and first-aid training, I was recently certified by St. John Ambulance. Being in a room full of dummies and other potential applicants for two days really gave me the energy and determination to keep myself alive in that suffocating gym. I guess you can say I saved my own life there. I also saw how incompetent the other applicants were, and how much could be put at risk if you were to hire anyone else but me.

Sir or Madam, I sincerely believe that with my nature and my experience, I can be an invaluable asset to the community center. I will work to the best of my ability to ensure that the children’s time at the park is worthwhile, and that they wear SPF 60 sunscreen at all times, because premature aging is a real issue these days.

I would love to hear from you soon. Call me.


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